So many of us will Celebrate Mother’s Day this year as a mom, while simultaneously experiencing the loss and heartache that comes with the recent loss of our own moms. The recent pandemic has stripped so many of us of the opportunity to share final moments together and participate in the supportive rituals that help us find closure and move forward with our grief.
I would like to share a few ideas on ways to make your Mother's Day special and at the same time maybe start a family tradition of remembering your own Mom.
Create a perennial garden in your yard
Perennial gardens are perfect for showing up each year, in most cases, bigger and brighter than the year before. The garden can become as elaborate or as simple as you desire. Start with one perennial plant and each year, on "Mother's Day," add a new plant to the space. Need some ideas for personalizing your garden?
Personalize your perennials by picking blooms in Mom's favorite colors, favorite plants, or even plants that will multiply over the years allowing you the opportunity to take cuttings and share with other family members.
Write an "angel message" to your mom in heaven and bury it beneath the plant. Each year, you can create a connection by adding a new message to every plant.
Place a wooden log, stump, or bench in the garden so that you have a place to sit and reflect or simply have a "mom moment".
Add a flag, stepping stone, or statue to personalize the area. This is a great project if you are creative or have children that love to get their hands dirty.
Cook Mom's Favorite Family Recipe
Who doesn't love Grandma's recipes? They have been passed down to you and it is your responsibility to keep it moving through the family. What better time to do that than on Mother's Day, in your kitchen with your children or even grandchildren. Of course, I have a few ideas to personalize this activity as well:
Start with the perfect apron. I mean try to find any and all old family aprons. The more worn the better, as they provide the history and stained memories that make this event special.
Make sure that you gather all the ingredients ahead of time, but don't pre-measure as this is part of the fun, since many of the old recipes use words such as scant, just a pinch, a handful. Also, watch the confusion on the young people's face when they need to convert old measurements; it's truly memorable in itself!
Take photos of the process and of course, the completed recipe! These photos can be attached to the recipe and catalogued in a 3 ring binder for years of memories!
Visit with the Elderly
The elderly population is living longer than ever before and unfortunately, many of them are alone. The old saying that bringing other people joy brings happiness and joy into your own life has been proven over and over again. Don't know where to start? Here are some ideas:
Contact one of you Mother's friends and set up a time to meet with them. Even though they may have family around, spending time with her friend's daughter will help her loss as well. Bring along some unexpected flowers or fresh fruit to brighten her day.
Call a local senior living facility and ask if they would provide you with a name of someone who may be alone this mother's day and set up a visit. If due to the pandemic you are unable to do that, ask them if they could give you a name and mailing address and send them a special card. Who knows, you may end up with a new pen pal! For sure, you will brighten their day!
I hope that you are able to take advantage of some of these suggestions to make your Mother's Day special, despite the difficulties you faced this past year.
Remember that it isn't the grand gestures in life that stay in the forefront of our memories; but rather the emotional connection to others that are made along the way!
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